Saturday, December 10, 2011

Don't Think Twice

Music and Me

This song was released at a time when I didn't really appreciate the talent of Michael Jackson. I heard this song performed the other night on the X-Factor and really HEARD it for the first time. Wow, it hit a chord with me. Music has always been my lover. Always there...



Friday, December 9, 2011

You're Always With Me

I saw the movie "Our Idiot Brother" tonight. I liked it; the story was good, but so was the soundtrack. People who know me know my ear is always listening to the music in the background. Listening to the music of a movie or television show, or just the music playing in the background of Life.

I heard just a snippet of this song and immediately thought of a friend. After the movie was over I found the complete song.
:)








Monday, December 5, 2011

HOW TO BE ALONE by Tanya Davis


I saw this on youtube and wanted to share it. Not necessarily am I saying I'm alone but hey, aren't we all in some way or another? What this suggests you do is easier said than done, because I think all humans need love. Need someone. It does give some comfort simply in letting you know you aren't alone in having that feeling.

The video is "by filmmaker Andrea Dorfman and poet/singer/songwriter Tanya Davis.

Davis wrote the beautiful poem and performed in the video which Dorfman directed, shot, animated by hand and edited. The video was shot in Halifax, Nova Scotia and was produced by Bravo!FACT"




[Tanya Davis]
If you are at first lonely, be patient.


If you’ve not been alone much, or if when you were, you weren’t okay with it, then just wait. You’ll find it’s fine to be alone once you’re embracing it.


We can start with the acceptable places, the bathroom, the coffee shop, the library, where you can stall and read the paper, where you can get your caffeine fix and sit and stay there. Where you can browse the stacks and smell the books; you’re not supposed to talk much anyway so it’s safe there.


There is also the gym, if you’re shy, you can hang out with yourself and mirrors, you can put headphones in.


Then there’s public transportation, because we all gotta go places.


And there’s prayer and mediation, no one will think less if your hanging with your breath seeking peace and salvation.


Start simple. Things you may have previously avoided based on your avoid being alone principles.


The lunch counter, where you will be surrounded by “chow downers”, employees who only have an hour and their spouses work across town, and they, like you, will be alone.


Resist the urge to hang out with your cell phone.


When you are comfortable with “eat lunch and run”, take yourself out for dinner; a restaurant with linen and Silverware. You’re no less an intriguing a person when you are eating solo desert and cleaning the whip cream from the dish with your finger. In fact, some people at full tables will wish they were where you were.


Go to the movies. Where it’s dark and soothing, alone in your seat amidst a fleeting community.


And then take yourself out dancing, to a club where no one knows you, stand on the outside of the floor until the lights convince you more and more and the music shows you. Dance like no one’s watching because they’re probably not. And if they are, assume it is with best human intentions. The way bodies move genuinely to beats, is after-all, gorgeous and affecting. Dance until you’re sweating. And beads of perspiration remind you of life’s best things. Down your back, like a book of blessings.


Go to the woods alone, and the trees and squirrels will watch for you. Go to an unfamiliar city, roam the streets, they are always statues to talk to, and benches made for sitting gives strangers a shared existence if only for a minute, and these moments can be so uplifting and the conversation you get in by sitting alone on benches, might of never happened had you not been there by yourself.


Society is afraid of alone though. Like lonely hearts are wasting away in basements. Like people must have problems if after awhile nobody is dating them.


But lonely is a freedom that breathes easy and weightless, and lonely is healing if you make it.


You can stand swathed by groups and mobs or hands with your partner, look both further and farther in the endless quest for company.


But no one is in your head. And by the time you translate your thoughts an essence of them maybe lost or perhaps it is just kept. Perhaps in the interest of loving oneself, perhaps all those “sappy slogans” from pre-school over to high school groaning, we’re tokens for holding the lonely at bay.


Cause if you’re happy in your head, then solitude is blessed, and alone is okay.


It’s okay if no one believes like you, all experiences unique, no one has the same synapses, can’t think like you, for this be relived, keeps things interesting, life’s magic things in reach, and it doesn’t mean you aren’t connected, and the community is not present, just take the perspective you get from being one person in one head and feel the effects of it.


Take silence and respect it.


If you have an art that needs a practice, stop neglecting it, if your family doesn’t get you or a religious sect is not meant for you, don’t obsess about it.


You could be in an instant surrounded if you need it.


If your heart is bleeding, make the best of it.


There is heat in freezing, be a testament.



Copyrights: Tanya Davis

Saturday, November 26, 2011

***wondering***

I came across this paragraph as I was browsing online. I added the photo to help emphasize that this is being seen from a male perspective. I know my family doesn't know the "complete me"; I don't think even my closest friend understands my fear or my point of view. Yes, yes, I wonder... as I continue daily to put on my mask.
 

"I constantly wonder how my life looks in other people’s eyes. Do they think I have it easy? Do they think I have nothing going for myself? Or are they fascinated with who I am? The thing is that no one will ever know my whole story. No one will ever know the things I’ve had to overcome. Not even my closest friends, not even my whole family. The thing is that people are so quick to judge nowadays. You only see a person from what they want and allow you to see. I always try to look as put together as I can, and I guess that’s my way of hiding from the truth. That way, everyone will assume that everything in my life is okay. That I never go through anything. If only people knew how broken I am, how I’m holding on for dear life on this one last strand that’s recently become very delicate. The truth is that no one really knows me. No one will ever know me, and sometimes that scares me because no one will ever know why I am the way I am." ~ Unknown





Only I know the melody of my life.
 

Friday, November 25, 2011

GBE2.27 - LAUGHTER

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Hi there... remember me? I know it has been awhile. This is just a quickie I am posting. Laughter is so important to all of us... I know it is something I need to do more. Just when I think I've found something to make me smile... *sighs* I shouldn't rely on others for amusement. Heaven knows I do enough to make myself laugh.

So, come on in, sit a spell laughter. Keep me company.

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Thursday, August 4, 2011

Emptiness

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Emptiness is filling me,

to the point of agony
.~




"Fade to Black" Metallica


Saturday, June 18, 2011

GBE 2.4 - Control



So this week the topic is control. Seems like at one time or another, everyone wants and/or needs a little control.

That being said... Here is a flashback to listen to.








When I was 17, I did what people told me



Did what my father said, and let my mother mold me



But that was long ago





Chorus:



I'm in control, never gonna stop



Control, to get what I want



Control, I got to have a lot



Control, now I'm all grown up





First time I fell in love



I didn't know what hit me



So young and so naive



I thought it would be easy



But now I know I've got to take...





Repeat Chorus





That's right, I'm on my own,



I'll call my own shots, thank you





Bridge:



Got my own mind



I wanna make my own decisions



When it has to do with my life, my life



I wanna be the one in control





So let me take you by the hand



And lead you on this dance



Cause what I've got is because I took a chance



I don't wanna rule the world



Just wanna run my life



So make your life a little easier



When you get the chance just take...





Repeat Chorus





Free at last, out here on my own



Now control this



That's right, career moves



I do what's right for me



And me wants to groove



Is that ok?





Repeat Bridge





Hop to it



I'm in control (and I love it, that's right)



Control, now I've got a lot



Control, now I'm all grown up



I'm in control, I'm in control



Don't make me lose it


Friday, June 10, 2011

GBE 2.3 - Lost & Found (reversed)

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Found and Lost

I remember when I first found her page on MySpace a few years ago. The page was so bright and summery. We became "MySpace friends" and slowly got to know each other. Over time, we became closer. We shared things. We talked. A lot.

We listened to each other. I tried to be a shoulder for her although I didn't entirely understand what she was going through. She got a piece of my heart.


She still has that piece, even though we grew apart. Like a star, our friendship flared and burned out, although it served a purpose. Still, in essence, I lost her. She will often cross my mind and I trust that she is doing well. I think she is.

Monday, May 30, 2011

GBE 2.2 - Success



The definition of success (səkˈses) in the dictionary is:
1. The accomplishment of an aim or purpose;
2. The attainment of popularity or profit.




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I was raised and taught by my parents that successful people were happy with themselves and made a positive impact on the people around them. But when I was in middle and high school, I attended a school where the prevailing attitude was that you were only successful if you achieved fortune and fame. The more money you made, the higher your degree of success. In defense of the school, which was, and still is academically great and where I met some really fantastic people, I don't think they realized it.




Fast forward 30 years... I have not made a ton of money... yet (lol), nor has my life even gone in the direction I thought it would. "Lately it occurs to me, what a long strange trip it's been". Those lyrics sure fit my life. I have some regrets over things I have not become and accomplished, but my life is far from over. All in all, I am happy with myself. I also like to think I have a "quiet impact" on the people around me.




The song I Was Here by Lady Antebellum has a line in it that I am striving for. "I wanna try to touch a few hearts in this life... And leave nothing less than something that says I was here."





If I can accomplish that and be happy, then I'll think myself a success. See, I consider the following definition from Ralph Waldo Emerson to be the correct one for success.




"What is success? To laugh often and much; To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; To appreciate beauty; To find the best in others; To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived; That is to have succeeded." - Ralph Waldo Emerson






Now... some views from other people. What, you thought I wouldn't list some quotes??? lol.







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"Success is often achieved by those who don't know that failure is inevitable." - Coco Chanel







"The only place in life where you find success before work is in the dictionary." - Mary V. Smith







"Impatience never commanded success." - Edwin H. Chapin







"If you want success, then don't rely on other people to do what YOU can do!" - Sasha Azevedo







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"Success is that old ABC - ability, breaks and courage." - Charles Luckman










"You must learn from your past mistakes, but not lean on your past successes." - Denis Waitley










"Success is a state of mind. If you want success, start thinking of yourself as a success." - Joyce Brothers










"The great success of a successful marriage is to treat all disasters as incidents and none of the incidents as disasters." - Sir Harold Nicholson










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"Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude." - Thomas Jefferson










"Learn to adapt. Things change, circumstances change. Adjust yourself and your efforts to what it is presented to you so you can respond accordingly. Never see change as a threat, because it can be an opportunity to learn, to grow, evolve and become a better person." - Rodolfo Costa










"Along with success comes a reputation for wisdom." - Euripides










"They can because they think they can." - Virgil










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"We are all motivated by a keen desire for praise, and the better a man is, the more he is inspired to glory." - Cicero










"Keep steadily before you the fact that all true success depends at last upon yourself."- Theodore T. Hunger











"The thing always happens that you really believe in; and the belief in a thing makes it happen." - Frank Loyd Wright











"The surest way not to fail is to determine to succeed." - Richard Brinsley Sheridan










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"The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows." - Aristotle Onassis










"A failure is a man who has blundered, but is not able to cash in on the experience." - Elbert Hubbard










"There is only one success--to be able to spend your life in your own way." - Christopher Morley










"Success is sweet: the sweeter if long delayed and attained through manifold struggles and defeats." - A. Branson Alcott










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"The difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack in will." - Vince Lombardi










"Success is refusing to accept defeat." - Zurek










"I cannot give you the formula for success, but I can give you the formula for failure--which is: Try to please everybody." - Herbert Bayard Swope










"The secret of success in life is for a man to be ready for his opportunity when it comes." - Earl of Beaconsfield










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"Success does not consist in never making blunders, but in never making the same one a second time." - Josh Billings










"Success is the good fortune that comes from aspiration, desperation, perspiration and inspiration." - Evan Esar









"If you wish success in life, make perseverance your bosom friend, experience your wise counselor, caution your elder brother, and hope your guardian genius." - Jospeph Addison










"The talent of success is nothing more than doing what you can do, well." - Henry W. Longfellow










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"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There's no use being a damn fool about it." - W.C. Fields











"Try not to become a man of success but a man of value." - Albert Einstein











"Success is the accomplishment of that which most people think can't be done." - C. V. White











"Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out." - Robert Collier





Friday, May 27, 2011

GBE 2.1 - Expectations

Expectation/ekspekˈtāSHən/Noun





"In the case of uncertainty, expectation is what is considered the most likely to happen. An expectation, which is a belief that is centered on the future, may or may not be realistic. A less advantageous result gives rise to the emotion of disappointment. If something happens that is not at all expected it is a surprise. An expectation about the behavior or performance of another person, expressed to that person, may have the nature of a strong request, or an order." [1]






I used to have expectations... of myself, of family, of friends, of co-workers. I have learned (the hard way) that you can't have them of other people. I keep them for myself as motivation to learn and grow. Continue and read what some other people have said about expectations.




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"A master can tell you what he expects of you. A teacher, though, awakens your own expectations." - Patricia Neal



"Both expectations and memories are more than mere images founded on previous experience." - Samuel Alexander



"Confounding people's expectations was a way to maintain integrity." - Lindsey Buckingham



"Don't live down to expectations. Go out there and do something remarkable." - Wendy Wasserstein



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"Don't lower your expectations to meet your performance. Raise your level of performance to meet your expectations. Expect the best of yourself, and then do what is necessary to make it a reality." - Ralph Marston



"Don't show off every day, or you'll stop surprising people. There must always be some novelty left over. The person who displays a little more of it each day keeps up expectations, and no one ever discovers the limits of his talent." - Baltasar Gracian



"Dreaming is one thing, and working towards the dream is one thing, but working with expectations in mind is very self-defeating." - Michael Landon



"I don't have expectations. Expectations in your life just lead to giant disappointments." - Michael Landon



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"Have you heard of this new thing called the internet? It's giving people new expectations. It's allowing them to become their own expert. Knowledge lies anxious at their fingertips. Gloss over the truth in your advertising and you'll quickly be dismissed as a poser." - Roy H. Williams



"I am not in this world to live up to other people's expectations, nor do I feel that the world must live up to mine." - Fritz Perls



"I find my life is a lot easier the lower I keep everyone's expectations." - Bill Watterson



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"I'm not in this world to live up to your expectations and you're not in this world to live up to mine." - Bruce Lee



"I have great expectations for the future, because the past was highly overrated." - Sylvester Stallone



"I love the idea of stepping out of the band situation into a solo world with no boundaries, no expectations, where nothing is out of bounds." - Tommy Shaw




"I've always got such high expectations for myself. I'm aware of them, but I can't relax them." - Mary Decker Slaney



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"If you accept the expectations of others, especially negative ones, then you never will change the outcome." - Michael Jordan



"If you paint in your mind a picture of bright and happy expectations, you put yourself into a condition conducive to your goal." - Norman Vincent Peale



"It's great being blonde - with such low expectations it's easy to impress." - Pamela Anderson



"It's when ordinary people rise above the expectations and seize the opportunity that milestones truly are reached." - Mike Huckabee



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"Keep high aspirations, moderate expectations, and small needs." - William Howard Stein



"Let your dreams outgrow the shoes of your expectations." - Ryunosuke Satoro



"Life... It tends to respond to our outlook, to shape itself to meet our expectations." - Richard M. DeVos



"Lower your expectations of earth. This isn't heaven, so don't expect it to be." - Max Lucado



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"My expectations of other people, I double them on myself." - James Brown



"Never idealize others. They will never live up to your expectations." - Leo Buscaglia



"Other people may not have had high expectations for me... but I had high expectations for myself." - Shannon Miller



"Our environment, the world in which we live and work, is a mirror of our attitudes and expectations." - Earl Nightingale



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"Our limitations and success will be based, most often, on your own expectations for ourselves. What the mind dwells upon, the body acts upon." - Denis Waitley



"Simplicity is not the goal. It is the by-product of a good idea and modest expectations." - Paul Rand



"So, yeah, I can say I always set my expectations so high that I had a lot to live up to." - Johnny Bench



"The best things in life are unexpected - because there were no expectations." - Eli Khamarov



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"The expectations of life depend upon diligence; the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools." - Confucius



"The fewer expectations you have, the better." - Laurie Anderson



"The first and most optimistic response was complete rational expectations econometrics. A rational expectations equilibrium is a likelihood function. Maximize it." - Thomas J. Sargent



"The first step in exceeding your customer's expectations is to know those expectations." - Roy H. Williams



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"The interval between a cold expectation and a warm desire may be filled by expectations of varying degrees of warmth or by desires of varying degrees of coldness." - Samuel Alexander



"The secret to true happiness is a combination of low expectations and insensitivity." - Olivia Goldsmith



"There is hardly any activity, any enterprise, which is started out with such tremendous hopes and expectations, and yet which fails so regularly, as love." - Erich Fromm



"To free us from the expectations of others, to give us back to ourselves - there lies the great, singular power of self-respect." - Joan Didion



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"We all participate in weaving the social fabric; we should therefore all participate in patching the fabric when it develops holes mismatches between old expectations and current realities." - Anne C. Weisberg



"We don't want people to have expectations of us, but then we have expectations of everybody else." - Lauryn Hill



"We live in an era of revolution, the revolution of rising expectations." - Adlai Stevenson



"Winners make a habit of manufacturing their own positive expectations in advance of the event." - Brian Tracy



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"You can't base your life on other people's expectations." - Stevie Wonder



"Your expectations opens or closes the doors of your supply, If you expect grand things, and work honestly for them, they will come to you, your supply will correspond with your expectation." - Orison Swett Marden



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[1] Wikipedia

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Another open letter to Senator Andy Gardiner re: Wekiva Parkway


Hey Andy... me again

So let's add 1.8 billion to the "$2.3 billion in debt the authority has piled up over 46 years" Oh yeah, that's brilliant!

Yep, politics, pure and simple. Again, I must repeat something I said in my last two, count them, two emails that you never responded to. Go back and read them.

Why is it that politicians are so hyped to get this road built, but not the public whom they are elected to represent? I remember hearing a man say in regards to Rich Crotty's push to build it: That all he wanted was his name on the plaque. With mostly just politicians pushing it, it does make me wonder. Maybe it's that I just don't see the "whole picture" as to why this beltway is so freaking important.

I must also stress that the education and future of our children is more important than the completion of the beltway. You are saddling them with a debt that will not be payed off in their lifetime.

And why is a senator who doesn't represent or even live in the district it will impact pushing so for it to be built?

It does make me wonder...

Thursday, May 12, 2011

An open letter to Senator Andy Gardiner re: Wekiva Parkway

Hello Mr. Gardiner. I tried to email you about this: State senators to Xway: Build Wekiva Parkway now, but got a "form letter" out-of-office response. Here is an open letter to you from me:

This is my opinion and I wanted to share it with you. I just read the article in the Sun Sentinel regarding your push to build a road that I feel is, not only NOT necessary, but also something that will put us further in debt.


You may wonder how I know we don't need it... that's because I live off SR 46W. Although it does get congested at times, it is nothing that four-laning would not solve. The land is there to four lane and to have turn lanes. But to add 10 lanes is not only idiotic, but you would also be bankrupting the future generations, which is immoral. Why is it that politicians are so hyped to get this road built, but you hardly hear a word from the public?


I have lived in Florida all my life and I have been hearing talk about this final, and needless, part of Orlando's beltway for years now. Just like high speed rail, it was a pipe dream and should remain such.


This is the first time I have ever felt compelled to email a congressman regarding how I felt about a situation. Yes, the area where I've lived for over 20 years will be disrupted. Sanford is still a small town at heart and this will kill that.


Use the money that you get for Education. The future of our children is FAR more important than a 26-mile long expressway. Use common sense.


I don't mean to sound harsh, but this road is a unicorn; a "bridge to nowhere". At least I've always thought that it was.


Andy, I wonder if YOU will even read this; I doubt it. I doubt you'll respond either. I guess I just had to vent.


Best regards


Wednesday, March 2, 2011

I Am

I am tempting, I am painful

I am everything you need

I am fearless, pure evil

On your soul I will feed



I will cut you to pieces

Of this I am sure

leave you anguished, alone

And writhing on the floor



I am jealous and envious

I cause nothing but pain

I will tear at your heartstrings

Again, and again



I will confuse you, amuse you

Make you suffer no doubt

When you think you are safe

I will rip your heart out



I am selfish, egotistical

I am pleasure and pain

I will torment you, absorb you

And drive you insane



I will make you believe

Then realize your worst fear

If you try to mistake me

You will pay most dear



You can not escape me

I will not allow

I will desperately hunt you

I will find you somehow



I will be in the shadows

I will wait in the rain

I will try and ignite you

Set your soul aflame



And once I have found you

Emotions run high

As I tear down your walls

Make you crumble inside



I will break every promise

I will always forsake

I am cold and as heartless

As a poisonous snake



My power you will harness

You are floating on air

And that's when I'll fill you

With dread and despair



You think you can't find me

And then when you do

I will take every breath

And emotion from you



In case you mistrust me

I'll go out of my way

To make you believe

Before I mislead and betray



Don't try to fight me

It is worse if you do

Then I will make you suffer

Like you never knew



I will make you surrender

you will be enslaved

And stand idly by

while I seduce and deprave



And when you recover

Which you will eventually do

When you least expect it

I will come back for you



So now you may wonder

Just who I am

I am love you poor fool

And I don't give a damn!



Copyright © 2007 Rose Rosen



Sunday, February 27, 2011

Untitled Poem

Life.


Art.


Start.


Blank canvas’,


conception, idea.


Choices, strokes,


imagination, brilliance.


Adored, beheld,


intimate, infused.


Deliberate, impulsive,


rejected, abandoned.


Triumphant, adorned,


epitaph, framed,


Eternity, eternal.


A masterpiece.



Maria Virgilio