Saturday, May 30, 2009

GBE 90 - Driving

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A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. ~Peter De Vries





Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams. ~Mary Ellen Kelly






Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you and scorn in the one ahead.
~Mac McCleary




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It takes 8,460 bolts to assemble an automobile, and one nut to scatter it all over the road. ~Author Unknown




The civilized man has built a coach, but has lost the use of his feet. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson, "Self-Reliance," 1841





The best car safety device is a rear-view mirror with a cop in it. ~Dudley Moore





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It wasn't the Exxon Valdez captain's driving that caused the Alaskan oil spill. It was yours. ~Greenpeace advertisement, New York Times, 25 February 1990



A pedestrian is someone who thought there were a couple of gallons left in the tank. ~Author Unknown





Leave sooner, drive slower, live longer. ~Author Unknown





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Every time I see an adult on a bicycle, I no longer despair for the future of the human race. ~H.G. Wells





Your grandchildren will likely find it incredible - or even sinful - that you burned up a gallon of gasoline to fetch a pack of cigarettes! ~Dr. Paul MacCready, Jr.





A city that outdistances man's walking powers is a trap for man. ~Arnold Toynbee




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Any man who can drive safely while kissing a pretty girl is simply not giving the kiss the attention it deserves. ~Albert Einstein




I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol. ~Author Unknown


Hug your kids at home, but belt them in the car. ~Author Unknown





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A tree never hits an automobile except in self defense. ~American Proverb





Americans are broad-minded people. They'll accept the fact that a person can be an alcoholic, a dope fiend, a wife beater, and even a newspaperman, but if a man doesn't drive, there is something wrong with him. ~Art Buchwald, "How Un-American Can You Get?," Have I Ever Lied to You?, 1966





Modern technology

Owes ecology

An apology.
~Alan M. Eddison





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Never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly. ~Author Unknown



When buying a used car, punch the buttons on the radio. If all the stations are rock and roll, there's a good chance the transmission is shot. ~Larry Lujack





The car has become the carapace, the protective and aggressive shell, of urban and suburban man. ~Marshall McLuhan, Understanding Media





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Car sickness is the feeling you get when the monthly payment is due. ~Author Unknown






The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers. ~Dave Barry, "Things That It Took Me 50 Years to Learn"





The longest journey begins with a single step, not with a turn of the ignition key. ~Edward Abbey




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The car has become a secular sanctuary for the individual, his shrine to the self, his mobile Walden Pond. ~Edward McDonagh





Restore human legs as a means of travel. Pedestrians rely on food for fuel and need no special parking facilities. ~Lewis Mumford






I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. ~Steven Wright






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A commuter tie-up consists of you - and people who for some reason won't use public transit. ~Robert Brault






You never really learn to swear until you learn to drive. ~Author Unknown






Automobiles are not ferocious.... it is man who is to be feared. ~Robbins B. Stoeckel





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The shortest distance between two points is under construction. ~Noelie Altito




Road rage is the expression of the amateur sociopath in all of us, cured by running into a professional. ~Robert Brault



Driving a brand new car feels like driving around in an open billfold with the dollars flapping by your ears as they fly out the window. ~Grey Livingston






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If everything comes your way, you are in the wrong lane. ~Author Unknown






Each year it seems to take less time to fly across the ocean and longer to drive to work. ~Author Unknown





Anyone driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac. ~Author Unknown



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The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. ~Jason Love






I represent what is left of a vanishing race, and that is the pedestrian.... That I am still able to be here, I owe to a keen eye and a nimble pair of legs. But I know they'll get me someday. ~Will Rogers






Recklessness is a species of crime and should be so regarded on our streets and highways. ~Marlen E. Pew



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For every "Drive Safely" sign, shouldn't there be a "Resume Normal Driving" sign? ~Robert Brault






Another way to solve the traffic problems of this country is to pass a law that only paid-for cars be allowed to use the highways. ~Will Rogers





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What a lucky thing the wheel was invented before the automobile; otherwise can you imagine the awful screeching? ~Samuel Hoffenstein






If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend. ~Doug Larson




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On the other hand, the Bible contains much that is relevant today, like Noah taking 40 days to find a place to park. ~Curtis McDougall






Road sense is the offspring of courtesy and the parent of safety. ~Australian Traffic Rule, quoted in Quotations for Special Occasions by Maud van Buren






The car has become... an article of dress without which we feel uncertain, unclad, and incomplete. ~Marshall McLuhan, Understanding Media, 1964





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Walking isn't a lost art - one must, by some means, get to the garage. ~Evan Esar



Remember folks, street lights timed for 35 mph are also timed for 70 mph. ~Jim Samuels


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This is my submission to the GBE. This week's topic is Driving. The GBE, or Group Blogging Experience is great fun. Each week (usually on Tuesday) we are given a general topic by our fearless leader Alicia and we have until that Saturday to blog about it. Say whatever you want. Silly, serious, true, fiction, debate.... whatever. It's up to you. If your interested just go to Alicia's Blog and check it out. If you want to participate comment her blog saying "I'm in" , that's it. No big sign up or anything. You blog and she'll link to your blog and everyone else's on Saturday. Make sure you're not private though so that everyone can read your blog.

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